How to to Control Your Thoughts

"The best thing about the past is that it's over. The best thing about the future is that it's yet to come. The best thing about the present is that it's here now." - Richard Bandler

Life is here for us to experience, to learn, to grow. Sometimes we learn the hard way, sometimes we learn with joy and happiness. Our perspectives very much affect the way we choose to see our life experience. These could be misfortunes, pain, discomfort, and/or joy, happiness and pleasure. Believe it or not, many people unconsciously choose to learn the hard way. Never really believing in themselves and putting it down to “just bad luck”, “it always happens to me”, “I’ve come to expect it now”, “my life is rubbish.” But there is very good reason for this; beliefs, values, habits, addictions are all learned behaviors. If you’ve had a challenging life there may very well be a continuous belief that you are worth nothing more than this. But you are wrong! Everyone deserves to be happy and the difference between an optimist and a pessimist is simply the first 4 letters!

The unconscious mind is a powerful part of all of us, it’s where your thoughts, your behaviors, your thinking, your memories, your habits; your entire model of the world lives from this magical and mystical place! It has taken in every detail of everything you have ever seen, done, heard, smelt, tasted. Isn’t that amazing?

It’s no wonder that it’s a little difficult sometimes to move forward when the chains of your past are holding you back. Or maybe you have that little voice whispering in your ear that you are no good at something, that you don’t deserve to be happy.

If you find that your general thinking is along these lines, then it’s time to take back control! Life doesn’t have to be a struggle, things don’t need to be more difficult than they are because you can change how you think!

When you find yourself going back into a past memory or saying something which is detrimental to your well-being follow this simple technique:

• Find a quiet place where you can sit and not be interrupted and close your eyes (you can keep your eyes open if it’s easier).

• Bring in the thought or the words that are causing you frustration or discomfort.

• Really connect with the emotions as though it is happening now, notice where you feel it, see it, hear it, smell it, taste it.

• As soon as you feel the connection, imagine or pretend to step back out of the experience so you can see yourself there, as though you are watching yourself on a movie screen.

• When you are ready, using your imagination, push the screen away from you, as far as possible across the room, across to next door, across to the next county, city, into the sea, into another country! As far away as you can until it is no longer in your sight.

• Come back into the room, ask yourself what color your front door is or do a quick jog on the spot…..(trust me on that bit!).

If you are doing this properly it should only take one or two turns, but if you find it a little more challenging using your imagination you can try it as many times as you like. The most important thing is that you are fully connected to the feeling when you push the screen away from you.